Survived my first work week

My first week at work wasn't too bad. I missed Amanda and Wayne a lot, and I was absolutely tired out with everything but I cheated a little, I took a day off on Thursday. Still, it went better than I expected. I  have always felt that somewhat 'un-understood', that everyone underestimates the kind of emotional adjustment we have to go through with going back to work. We go through such an emotional experience of giving birth. Spend the next four months, 24 hours each day putting our hearts and soul into caring for this tiny wee baby that we grow to bond with tremendously. And the very next moment, with the snap of our fingers, we are 'expected' to just drop everything and switch to full working mode. Emotionally, it is very tough, having to just leave our babies and get going with work - immediately. But well, no one would really understand, and no point complaining, we just have to get going on. 

Maybe I still need more time to get used to this new routine, but every day seems to be adrenaline packed, with all that rushing from the moment I open my eyes in the morning to the time I konk out in bed at night.

Our day starts around 630-645am. I wake up, shower, make up, express milk, pack Amanda's bag and then mine (pump, parts, etc etc). The husband wakes up, showers, washes my pump parts, packs Wayne's bag, prepares Wayne's milk, brushes his teeth and changes him into his school uniform. While he does that, I feed Amanda her milk. We leave home at 750- 8am.

I drop Wayne and husband at Paragon, where he would bring Wayne up to school and then take the train down to his workplace. I, on the other hand, make my way to the east, dropping Amanda at nainai's place before heading to work at CBP. I reach work at 9am.

(Before I start work, I'm already tired from the morning mad rush).

I try to get as much work done during the day, expressing milk twice at 11am and 4pm for half and hour each time. It's disruptive to work. Add in breakfast and lunch moments, there is hardly time for much productive work. I need to try harder.

I leave office at 530-545pm, pick Amanda up at 6pm so that I can pick the husband and head to Paragon to get Wayne before his school closes at 7pm. Most days, despite me leaving office at 545pm, we make it to Wayne's school only just in time, with the evening traffic.

When we get home, I change Amanda into her pyjamas, play with her for that short precious 5 to 10 minutes before I let her play alone in her cot for 20 to 30 minutes while the rest of us have our dinner. Thanks to nainai for packing home-cooked yummy dinner for us - we get to enjoy a nice dinner after a long day and it saves us the hassle and time of dabao-ing food home.

After dinner, I give Amanda her last feed for the night before she falls asleep - usually around 8pm. I sulk a little at this point, cos really, each night I barely get to spend any time with her at all. Sigh. Anyway.. that's when the husband starts washing the dinner dishes, Wayne's school bottles and my pump equipments. I shower, express milk, do one round of laundry and pack whatever I can for the next day. Husband bathes for Wayne and either one of us prepares his milk, reads a story book for him, gives him his medicine and supplements, change him into his pyjamas and prepares him for bed.

By then, I am exhausted and usually end up in bed with Wayne by 10pm while the husband enjoys some time to himself surfing the Internet and watching the television. I don't know how he does that after such a long day, especially when he helps out as much as I do with the things at home! 

Amanda sleeps through till around 2 to 3am - when she stirs, I'd usually give her her pacifier and sometimes she would fall back asleep. Other times, she would cry and I would give her a milk feed. On other good nights, she would sleep through all the way till 6am. Regardless, I wake up around 2 to 3am to express milk. Wondering when I should start skipping this round of early morning expressing of milk.. I guess I could now, but I am just worried my milk supply will drop. 

Well, and then, the day starts again at 645am. So there. No time for anything else.

But I survived!

And I guess it will only get better as I get used to this routine. Well, unless work gets really busy and I need to bring work home.. Should that happen, I really don't know where to squeeze in time for work.. but one step at a time!!

Hooray to next week - a public holiday on Tuesday and we will be on leave on Friday!